Before the next flight

I had a turbulent landing a while ago – almost like a free fall for a few seconds – a woman was crying, the couple next to me were holding each other tightly, and to bring a finality to the pending doom the air hostess began speaking in an urgent, disturbed voice.

I was thinking “So this is what it feels like!” I thought what if this was it? Me alone on a plane, middle of nowhere – that’s it. How long before my family would know? Would they find me? I know it has happened with many, the missing Malaysian airlines being the most recent example, but there is a difference between when it happens on the news and when it happens to you.

I was wondering if I had said a proper goodbye to my husband before leaving in the morning, and calling out to God, since I have heard that if your final thoughts are about God you go to heaven(and I still maintain I’m not overtly religious). I also realized how much I love being alive. I am grateful that I lived to write this, and hopefully there will be more.

This also made me aware of the fact that I haven’t written about my marriage yet, and it has been exactly 7 months today. I got married in December last year and am in the “happily ever after” phase of my life. It has been the most interesting part of my life so far, has made me acutely aware of myself than anything else ever has. My husband stays as far away from books as I cling on to them. The only exception he makes to reading anything except news is my blog. He is practical while I am dreamy; I am thoughtful while he is impulsive. Together, we are making each other better people with every passing day.

I don’t have my wedding picture handy, but this is a picture of us from last weekend.

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On a Personal Note

I haven’t written in the longest time, and it has been much longer since I have meditated.

I meditate, not as much as I want to, but enough to realize what I lose when I am not meditating. I lose the power to solve my problems. I also lose the power to not conjure up problems where none exist. I think all the time; the amount of time I waste thinking and the monsters I create in the stories I whip up inspired from the happenings around me, make me think even more – on how to deal with these monsters and how to get myself out of these stories. But I can’t get out of something that’s inside my head, can I?

When I meditate, I can think clearly. I can tune out the noise, see things more objectively and hear the feeble voice of reason tell me what to do.

People often scoff at me; meditation to them is a retirement indulgence, when there is plenty of time to kill and nothing to do. I am too young for all that stuff I am told. Some even confuse it with religious activities. Meditation actually, is a state of thoughtlessness. Just listening to your surroundings, becoming aware of the present rather than chasing unseen butterflies your mind conjures in thousands every minute. It doesn’t need elaborate setups or yoga mats or Gurus or music or incense sticks. It just needs you to close your eyes and not think. And then you will be able to hear the thoughts that truly matter, that have been long waiting in line for your attention but you have been too distracted to notice them. For instance, I just meditated on a plane. That’s when the thought of writing this post came to my mind, among other productive thoughts that I haven’t had in a while. So I am writing it while I am in flight. I had been so involved in the thought of not liking the book I am currently reading and not being able to buy a new book before getting on the plane for a 6 hour long flight that I didn’t realize there were other things I could do too – like write this post! At least I am solving my other, more important problem – of deserting my blog.

Here is a very nice talk on Meditation: Andy Puddicombe: All it takes is 10 mindful minutes